26 June 2013


I have been Stomped again. To the best of my knowledge I have been Stomped at least twice before whilst living in Singapore. Once for threatening to set a young Singaporean man on fire on the train when he refused to give up his seat to a pregnant woman and once for jay walking across the street on which I live.

Dobbing is an Australian term that means to tattle or to squeal. Dobbing is to tell the Authorities and to inform the masses of someone else's wrong doings. The act of dobbing is not well regarded amongst the Australian community. To be regarded as a dobber is somewhat derogatory. It is a bit sneaky. We have all done it though. In Australian households it usually starts at home as children and particularly amongst siblings. My sister Jane was a dobber.

"Muuuuuum", she would often wail.

"Peter pulled the head off my barbie".

Or when she would witness me stealing cigarettes from the packet my father may have left on the kitchen bench.

"I'm going to tell Dad on you"

And she would tell Dad on me.

The Singaporean equivalent of dobbing is Stomping. Stomp is a Singaporean Web site where locals and any resident or visitor to Singapore can electronically dob. They take photos of things that aggrieve them with their mobile phones and they post these pictures on the Stomp Web page. The Singaporeans love it.

They really do.

The word 'stomp' is a derivation of the word 'stamp'. It's origins are Germanic. To 'stampfen' means "to stomp'. To me it conjures up unpleasant images of German Nazis kicking poor Jewish people during the holocaust or skinhead gangs brutally laying their boots into some poor immigrant in horrible acts of violence. An excellent Australian film called 'Romper Stomper' was made in 1992 and was about a group of Neo-Nazi skinheads who terrorized immigrant Vietnamese in suburban Melbourne. The film was low budget and featured a very young actor named Russell Crowe. He starred in his role as 'Hando' the skinhead gang leader.

Tragically he has not made a decent film since.  

I am going to include quite a lot of photos in this article today. I don't normally do this. Words are more my thing. However it is best that I gave some visual indication of what goes on in the Singaporean 'Stomp'. Here are some examples:

This girl was 'Stomped' for eating some noodles in class at university. Someone didn't approve.

Here are a couple of very many "Stomps" of couples kissing in public. This is not illegal in Singapore but many things are. A lot of people don't like it though so they 'Stomp' it:

This bloke was "Stomped" because someone didn't like that he was staring at the sleeping girl next to him on the train. His mouth is blurred and I don't know why. The bizarreness of this place sometimes overwhelms me:

Dozens of 'Stomps' are posted each day.

I had a slight altercation with a local chap when I was going to lunch today. Near my office. This man was walking and fiddling with his mobile phone in the building where I work and I suspect that he was playing Facebook. I was walking behind him and as he opened the door to exit the building he suddenly stopped. He blocked my way. Stopping suddenly in the silliest of places is common here on the Island and I encounter it all the time. I said, 'Excuse me" to him in a slightly harangued tone and he gave me the Singaporean stare.

He didn't budge.

I said, "Excuse me" to him again and he turned and took an aggressive step towards me and then he called me a "British pig"

I saw red - not at the 'pig' bit - just the 'British'. There is no greater insult to utter to an Australian.

"Move your arse fatso" I responded.

He took a step back and as I passed him he muttered something unintelligible but his tone was derogatory. When I turned to face him he took my photo with his mobile phone.

"You are Stomped lah" he declared.

I did not gratify him with a reply and resumed my march to get my lunch. I was hungry and couldn't be bothered dealing with him. However about ten minutes later when I was walking back to my office with my sandwich in hand I saw fatso siting outside. I couldn't resist the temptation to exact some revenge. I walked close to him and called out, "Hey fatso." He saw me and he looked away but I took his photo anyway. I said "You are Stomped lah" He wasn't very happy.  From the looks of him I doubt that he ever is:

Here is the big boy:

I have decided to do some Stomping myself. On the train on the way home I saw this woman sleeping in her seat. I will Stomp her:

This bloke was standing next to me on the train and was reading a book. I noticed that it was "Fifty Shades of Grey". This is a book that no man should ever read - in public at least - so I have decided that I will Stomp him as well:

Look out Singapore. 

I am commencing a Stomping frenzy.

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