So here we are,
at the penultimate post in the marathon A to Z thing. There is many a “Y” word to
choose from and the letter “Y” is sort of a word itself. It is a chromosome
actually.
It is a sex
thing.
Steady people - I
am not going to write about sex - although I could.
My mum wouldn’t
like it though and would carry on for days about it.
Wouldn’t you mum?
I should say that
the “Y” I am referring to is a gender or a genetic thing.
I will say it in
fact.
It is a gender or
a genetic thing.
I am no scientist
or genius but I do know that the “Y” chromosome is only present in men. We
blokes have one “Y” chromosome and one “X” chromosome and girls have two “X”
chromosomes. It is the “Y” chromosome and loving or hating shopping and
watching the football and leaving the toilet seat up that differentiates the
sexes.
Chromosomes are
itsy bitsy pieces of protein and nucleic acid material that are found in the
cells of all living animals. They are the genetic information that defines who
are or what we are - and breeding passes them on.
So it is a sex
thing.
But I am not
going to write about it.
Sex.
I have pretty
much forgotten about sex - the type that is used when breeding – or simply for
pleasure. I quite like it and I am pretty good at it but I can’t remember the
last time I actually had any.
Sex that is.
But I am not
going to write about it.
Chill out Mum.
I just thought I
would mention it.
The letter “Y” is
of course phonetically identical to the word “Why?” which is blatantly obvious
to any one who is literate. If you weren’t literate then you wouldn’t be
reading this so that is also blatantly obvious.
I am often afraid
to re-read what I write as much madness continues to engulf and consume me.
I think it is the
incessant heat of Singapore.
It could be
something in my chromosomes though.
Thanks a lot Mum
and Dad.
“Why?” would have
been a most excellent topic for writing about something. I could have asked, “Why
is there so much inequity and injustice in the world?” “Why are some of the
elderly neglected and abandoned by their families here in Singapore – to the
point where they are reliant on charity to feed them?” “Why are so many people mean
and nasty and selfish?” “Why can’t we all just live in peace?”
“Why did the
chicken cross the road?”
“Why” is not a
“Y” word though so I can’t use it.
I could have
written about ‘You’ – which is a “Y” word.
Fuck I just did
it again.
I pointed out the
obvious.
However to me the
fact that ‘You’ sounds like ‘U’ – which I have already written about – dissuaded
me. My ‘U’ post was entitled “’U’ is for Unliked” It was a commentary of the
Facebook phenomena.
Also I don’t
really know who ‘You’ are anyway.
I don’t really
know who I am sometimes either.
I am still working
that one out.
I contemplated
writing about ‘Yesterday’ but I didn’t really do anything very exciting then. Also
Paul McCartney penned the song “Yesterday” in his Beatles days - and while I
quite like the song, his post Beatles band Wings were dreadful and I find his
penchant for one-legged women to be an abomination.
I did see some
youngsters and yellow things and I exchanged some emails with some dear friends
of mine who live on a yacht. They are all nice “Y” words. My friends on the
yacht have been sailing around the Pacific Ocean for five years now. They are
just drifting about the place and having a ball.
Hello Craig and
Robyn.
Happy sailing
dudes – and stay safe out there on the ocean.
I hope you are
well.
I hope that you
are happy
I thought very
seriously about writing about Yin and Yang but after a bit of contemplation I
dismissed it. All that Yin and Yang really is – is some ancient Chinese philosophy
shit that means opposite forces in life are interconnected and they cancel each
other out. It is a concept that is sort of interesting but I couldn’t be
bothered with philosophy or deep thinking today.
I might have
yesterday but I am tired and my head hurts.
So I thought I
would write about Yak blankets from Nepal – and the time we sold them at a
fundraising thing for a charity I am involved with. There were a few stalls
selling stuff for their respective charities that day but ours was the only one
selling Yak blankets from Nepal.
The charity I am
involved with is called the Future Village Foundation and we build little
schools – or rather we add classrooms to existing ones - and we install
renewable energy systems in them. We also support the education of lots of little
children who come from very remote parts of the Himalaya – high up in the
mountains of Nepal.
I have been going to Nepal
for many years now and I have always loved Yak blankets. For the charity thing
I ordered and had delivered to me at my office five hundred of mixed coloured Yak
blankets from Nepal. They very all soft and beautiful and were in bright and
beautiful hues.
I spent most of the day at
the Yak blanket stall – first of all setting it up and then assisting with
manning it. I was manning the stall mostly with women.
Strange huh and I would think
politically incorrect in these day and times too?
I should have been “womaning”
it.
This word “womaning” has been
rejected by the fucker auto-correct function on my Mac and I have now had to
‘add it’ to rid myself of the red underscoring.
I hate the red underscoring.
I have for years been
bringing Yak blankets from Nepal back to Australia and Singapore as gifts for
my friends and family.
All of the women in my family
that I love adore them.
They really do.
I have quite a few Yak
blankets draped around my apartment in Singapore and in my house in Australia
as well. They add colour to the place and they brighten up my often dull and
mundane existence. At this event our little stall was raising money for the
school program that we run in the village of Katunje in the Dhading district of
Nepal. This is high in the majestic Himalaya mountain range.
Say it “Kar-tun-jay”
Say it “Dar-ding”
We volunteers at all of the
charity stalls were standing up for the entire day. I don’t know why there
weren’t any seats.
It was very hard work.
I was very footsore by the
end of the day.
I was battered.
It was nice however to be
surrounded by people doing good. There were very kind and pleasant people from
ten other charities there and my work colleagues supported them all in some way.
These are altruistic people.
I like the word 'altruistic' and I like the concept too. These people give
their own time to help others less fortunate than themselves. We should all do
more of it. Goodness rubs off I think. I am a believer in karma and the general
concept of doing good upon others.
My parents taught me this I
think or perhaps it was just passed on in the chromosomes I inherited.
However I believe that what
goes around comes around.
Hakuna Matata.
I am definitely not a
salesperson though. It is not my forte. I think perhaps I am a little too frank
and my brutal honesty needs to be curbed. A number of people who came to our
stall asked silly and ridiculous questions - well they seemed silly to me.
In return I gave them honest
answers - possibly a little too bluntly - but it is what I do.
I don’t believe in dishonesty
or fucking around.
The majority of the people who
bought our blankets and who asked silly questions had never been to Nepal so
they knew very little about what life is like over there.
It is tough.
It is harsh.
It is one of the world's most
impoverished nations.
On a number of occasions
people asked me unusual things - with genuine concern.
"Were these blankets
made using child labour?"
I was asked this many times
during the course of the day.
"Of course they
were" I replied.
"Why do you think
they are so bloody cheap?"
There was mostly nervous
laughter and the odd blank stare in response to my reply. “Was he being serious” was ticking through their blank little
minds?
I was.
I am.
Families support each other
in Nepal. Assistance in putting food on the table is a Nepalese child's
responsibility to the family. A close team effort is required for the daily
struggle for survival. The gentle and mostly Hindi Mountain People of Nepal
love their children though.
They love them deeply.
They love them dearly.
As they should.
Anyway our charity tries to
help a bit with education and creating opportunity but we are small potatoes
and we are definitely not miracle workers.
Even more annoying was the
more often repeated enquiry, "Were any Yaks harmed in the making of
these blankets?"
This is true.
I am serious!
"Absolutely" was my retort.
I
told them, "Yaks can be large, unruly and dangerous beasts. They are
formidable. They won't just roll over and let you cut their shaggy hair. The
Farmers shear their wool by hand. The Nepalese have to beat the fuckers into
submission for shearing".
I received more stunned
looks.
Disbelief.
Incredulation.
This is not really true and I
am obviously not really honest all of the time – just most of the time.
I thought I would throw that
one out there for my own amusement.
The Yak is formidable in size
only. It is otherwise quite a docile and harmless creature. The Yak lives at
very great heights where the oxygen is thin and all movement is slow. It is
very cold at such heights - which is why Yak wool is so thick and luxurious.
The Nepalese Mountain people
also make cheese and yoghurt from the Yak's milk. I have eaten both products
many times - with mo-mos. These are Nepalese dumplings. They are
delicious.
Really delicious.
We were selling these Yak
blankets very cheap. They were $25 each – that is in Singaporean dollars. We
saw that they were sold ‘on-line’ in the UK for more than forty pounds and in
the US for $80!
They are not easy to get.
I have a Yak blanket dude in
Kathmandu and I get them cheap when I buy in bulk.
As the day went on and my
patience frayed - when people asked me how much they were - I was quoting one
for $25, two for $60 and three for $100.
Ten for $500!
Some people saw the
humor.
Other suckers bought it.
Hook line and sinker!
We ran out of Yak
blankets from Nepal very quickly.
They sold like
hotcakes.
I like your sardonic sense of humor and find your frankness hysterical. The Yak blankets sound lovely and I would love to own one especially if I knew that the funds were going to support education. You may not think that your charity is doing big things and this will sound like cliche but education changes things and people in big ways so keep on doing what you're doing and thank you for your charity's efforts in Nepal. I am still snickering at your comment about the shepherds beating the yaks for their wool. :)
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