6 May 2013


I tried reading the book Fifty Shades of Grey a while back. I am sure that most of you have heard of it. There was a lot of hype in the media about it so I though I should give it a try. It wasn't really my cup of tea and I abandoned it after a few chapters. It wasn't particularly well written although I could see how it would appeal to some people. Singaporean women seemed to go crazy for it and it was on the best seller list here for ages. I think it was a best seller all around the world.

It was sort of soft porn in a Mills and Boonish sort of fashion and I assume that most of the readers are women. I imagine that the appeal is an absence of passion in most of their lives and the attraction of bondage and lust and uninhibited sex. 

That sort of thing.

I think I could write porn. The erotic sort that might appeal to female readers. I think that most blokes would tend to watch porn rather than read it but most of the guys that I know hardly even read anything anymore. I am guessing that the secret of writing soft porn is being more suggestive than explicit and the use of words like 'heaving" and "manhood" and 'pulsating" would be more appropriate than ‘fucking’ and ‘cocks’ and “tits”. Perhaps throwing in a bit of spanking and bondage would appeal as there seems to a bit of an audience for such things. More than seventy million people seem to think so at least.

I might give it a crack. Writing a bit of soft porn from a female perspective. I will in fact. This might be interesting. If there are any soft-porn-erotic-novel publishers out there that might be reading this and think there is a market please let me know and I will put you onto my Agent. 

Here we go.

She stood waiting at the foot of the bed in the semi darkness with only a towel wrapped around her torso. Her hair was still damp from the shower and small droplets of water dripped down her shoulders. Patchy moonlight illuminated the room and cast flickering shadows through the curtains as a gentle breeze blew in from the ocean. The only sound was of the waves breaking against the shore. The noise was rhythmical and soothing.

She closed her eyes and sighed as she heard the door open and then close. Her heart skipped a beat when she heard the click of the door lock. The moment that she had been waiting for all evening had arrived at last. He was here. She dared not turn around. She remembered his explicit instructions.

She could feel his presence and the distinct musky scent of his aftershave preceded him.

Seconds ticked by like minutes and she felt her skin prickle as one hand brushed the hair from the nape of her neck and she felt his hot breath on her damp skin. She shuddered as his hands gently traced their way down her shoulders and forearms.

She could feel her breathing quicken and her heart pounding and she shivered again as his lips brushed the lobe of her right ear. His kisses were soft and light. They were ever so light. Like the fluttering of butterfly wings against her skin. A small gasp escaped her lips as his tongue flicked behind her ear and his hands continued to moved lightly up and down her arms. She could feel every callous on his fingers as they traced their way again to her neck and goose bumps started rising all over her body as his lips brushed across her shoulders. She closed her eyes as she felt the towel drop to the floor and a semblance of a moan escaped her lips and she arched her back as he reached around her to cup each of her breasts and began to softly caress them.

All the time he was kissing her neck and ears and shoulders.

Her moaning intensified as both hands now softly kneaded each breast and his fingers traced tiny slow circles around each of her hardening nipples. His touch was sending what felt like small electric shocks up and down her spine. It was agony and ecstasy merged together. It was bliss. She arched her back and pushed back against him as he pressed closer to her and she could feel his manhood against the small of her back.

I hope you are now reading this with one hand and are wondering what might happen next. There will likely be a fair bit of pulsating and heaving and moaning and groaning.

If so then yes this stuff is really easy.  

Sorry Mum - I know you won't like it - but I might write some more one day.

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